N.Otorious Crimbo Combats [closed for judging] (2024)

Name: Sirenkit
ID: 1967326
(Pictures of items were sent via email)

Urgh... I know it may seem that I copied Discordia... But I didn't :/

You're fighting a fleet of frenzied shoppers

This year, the festival of Crimbo has been quite magical. So magical, in fact, that many of these last-minute shoppers have literally become one with their carts. How is this even possible? You soon arrive at a brief conclusion- You don't know. However, there's one thing you do conclude, and it's that you hope that you're not on their wishlist.

Hit Message(s):

Critical hit message:

Nearby, a store announces their "final" 245th sale on all children's toys. The shoppers then proceed to sail through you, in an attempt to not be left behind. Eek! Ouch! Oof! Ugh!

Miss message(s):

Fumble message:

This is a Random axe of Kindness. It is used to help distribute good feelings of peace and prosperity, if that's at all possible with an axe of this size. Well, at least it smells nice.

Type: weapon (2-handed axe)
Power: 200
Muscle required: 150
Selling Price: 1500 meat
(In-game plural: Random axis of kindness)

Enchantment:
All attributes +5%
Regenerate 10 HP and MP per adventure
Never Fumble

Heavy Crimbo Present

This is a heavy paper package, tied up with string. It probably contains everyone's favorite things.

Type: usable
Selling price: 100 meat
(In-game plural: Heavy Crimbo presents)

When used:

Yippee, a plain old wool sweater. Exactly what you wanted for Christmas, and nothing more.

NOT.

Type: shirt
Power: 25
Mysticality required: 5
Selling price: 1 meat
(In-game plural: Wool sweaters)

This is an old, old, children's riddle, recognized by all sorts of kids from all over the world. Dark and calamitous thoughts are scattered all throughout this riddle. In other words, it's your classic children's nursery rhyme.

Type: potion
Effect: Gotcha Nose!
Duration: 5 turns
Cannot be discarded
(In-game plural: Tom's Riddles)

Gotcha Nose!

Augh, he's gotcha nose! You start to shoot randomly after him, before realizing that he's stolen your hair as well. Drat.

Enchantment:
Mysticality +20%
2x chance of Critical Hit
Combat Initiative -1000%

Stocking Full of Goodies

This is a stocking full of goodies which everyone can enjoy! The good children receive candy, and the naughty children host barbecues!

Type: usable
Selling Price: 250 meat
(In-game plural: Stockings full of goodies)

When used:

You acquire an item: Heavy metal blimp (90% chance)
You acquire an item: Piece of wrapping paper (75% chance)
You acquire an item: Bag of Peppermints (100% chance)

Or, 3% of the time:

This is an extremely heavy blimp. It's about as useful as a lead zeppelin, and its only practical purpose is as an unstable paperweight. Come to think of it... that doesn't really make it practical at all.

Type: Potion
Selling price: 20 meat
(In-game plural: Heavy metal blimps)

When used:

Woe, you feel tied down and strangled in suffocation, as if you are unable to fly away! You're at the edge of sanity, and you are starting to develop suicidal tendencies. You plot means for your escape... and it's probably going to be through the use of an ancient mastodon, or perhaps through a warhorse? You don't know.

Enchantment:
Mysticality-5
Muscle+5
Moxie+1%

Piece of Wrapping Paper

This is a wad of wrapping paper. Don't worry about saving it for later... It'll only be torn to shreds by someone else!

Type: combat
Selling Price: 50 meat
(In-game plural: Pieces of wrapping paper)

When used:
You wrap you opponent up into a gift and sell it to peeps who work at a thrift. What a hardcore wrapper you are!

You gain (ML) meat.(Ends the adventure)

Bag of Peppermints

This bag is a doorway to endless possibilities. Peppermint patties, Peppermint tea, you name it.

(Cooking ingredient)
Type: usable
Selling price: 5 meat
(In-game plural: Bags of peppermint)

Using 1:

Using 5:

You manage to melt the peppermint with only the heat of your hands... Oh look, what is this?
You acquire an item: Peppermint Pike

Using 10:

You manage to melt the peppermint with only the heat of your hands... Oh look, what is this?
You acquire an item: Peppermint Pants

Using 20:

You manage to melt the peppermint with only the heat of your hands... Oh look, what is this?
You acquire an item: Peppermint Hat

Using an invalid number:

You can't seem to craft anything with this number of peppermints.

Peppermint Candy

This is a candy constructed from peppermints and sugar. Childhood memories suddenly start to flood back into your mind. They're not necessarily good ones, though.

Type: Accessory
Power: 25
Muscle required: 5
Outfit: Peppermint Guise
(In-game plural: Peppermint candies)

Peppermint Pike

This is a pike solely crafted with peppermint-flavored candy. Sure, achieve the same effect by sucking on it, but the fact that you made it with your own hands make it that much more special, mmhm.

Type: weapon (2-handed club)
Power: 130
Muscle required: 45
Cannot be discarded
(In-game plural: Peppermint pikes)

Enchantment:
Mysticality +15
Mysticality +2%

Peppermint Pants

These are pants crafted with the joyfulness that can only be found with candy canes. However, this joyfulness is limited-by restricting your movement... Eeurgh.

Type: pants
Power: 130
Muscle required: 35
Outfit: Peppermint Guise
Cannot be discarded
(In-game plural: Peppermint pantyhosen)

Enchantment:
Moxie +15
Moxie +2%
Combat Initiative -50%

Peppermint Hat

This is a large hat made out of-you guessed it- peppermint candy canes. It gives you a strange feeling of nostalgia though... Like a mix between classic childhood delights and bad haircuts.

Type: Hat
Power: 85
Muscle required: 25
Outfit: Peppermint Guise
Cannot be discarded

Enchantment:
Muscle +15
Muscle +2%

Peppermint Guise

Equipment:

Hat:

Peppermint Hat
Weapon:Peppermint Pike
Pants:Peppermint Pants
Accessory:Peppermint Candy

Effect:
• All attributes + 5%

•Trick-or-Treating in this outfit may yield a Bag of peppermints.
•This outfit allows you to get the Candy Cane Tattoo from the Pretentious Artist.
• This outfit requires 36 bags of peppermints.

Minty Chocolate

This is a small piece of minty chocolate. *It looks quite tasty and irresistible to your palate.

(Cooking Ingredient)
Type: Food (

Crappy)
Level required: 2
(In-game plural: Minty chocolates)

Recipe: (Bag of Peppermints+any chocolate item, excluding those with "white chocolate" in its name)

When consumed:

Do-ba-do-pa-do-be-do... This chocolate leaves your mouth feeling minty fresh!

Ah, peppermint bark. The strange food that, instead of being crafted from peppermint and tree bark, is created from a dazzling mix of artificial flavorings, sugar, and chocolate.

(Cooking Ingredient)
Type: Food(decent)
Level required: 3
(In-game plural: Peppermint bark)

Recipe: (White chocolate chips+Minty Chocolate)

You eat the peppermint bark. It's deliciously sweet and sweetly delicious!

This tea has been said to be quite beneficial. Beneficial meaning it will heal you in a multitude of ways, many innumerable and impossible to count. Cool. Drink up!

Type: beverage (awesome)
Selling price: 150 meat
(In-game plural: Peppermint teas)

Recipe: (Hippy herbal tea+Peppermint bark)

When consumed:
You drink the tea and... Wow! Just wow! You feel completely wide awake and alert. Jittery too.

If the character has the effect Beaten up, or some variant of the poison effect:

This peppermint patty seems to be magical beyond belief! Sorta like York & his friends. Kinda. Sorta. Ah, forget it.

Type: Food (decent)
Level required: 2
Selling price: 50 meat
(In-game plural: Peppermint patties)

Recipe: (Minty chocolate+any chocolate item, excluding those with "white chocolate" in its name)

When consumed:

You eat the peppermint patty. Shortly afterwards, a funny-looking kid with a large nose passes by you. Poor kid.

Pepperminty

You're instantly filled with pep, and now live life on the mintier side.

What could be inside? I don't know, but it rattles when you shake it. Wait, scratch that. It shakes by itself. Spooky. What could it possibly be?

Type: usable
Selling price: 150 meat
(In-game plural: Rattling Crimbo presents)

When used:

You acquire an item: Rattling box

Rattling box

No, this is not a box used to attract deer... In fact, from the looks of things, it'd probably scare the heck out of them! You pause briefly to wonder what's inside of it, then decide against it.

Type: usable
Selling price: 125 meat
(In-game plural: Rattling boxen)

When used:
You acquire an item: Rattling snake

Rattling Snake

Type: Familiar
Selling price: 200 meat
(In-game plural: Rattling Snakes)

When used:

You put the rattling snake in your Familiar-Gro™ terrarium.

Your other familiars try to calm it down a little-the frequent seizures are probably unhealthy for it. Probably.

Thrashing Snake

Ability: Poisons enemies

Throne: +5 to familiar weight, Delevels

Hatchling: Rattling Snake

Familiar-Specific Equipment:
Pill of Chlordiazepoxide

Ultimate Cage Match: OOO
Scavenger Hunt: X
Obstacle Course: O
Hide and Seek: OO

Combat messages:

•Regular Message:

<name> strikes your opponent. He winces for X damage.

Or

<name> sinks his teeth into you. Augh, it stings! You wince for X damage.

Or

<name> thrashes on the ground. You'd buy the poor guy a bird to eat if it wasn't in such a whirling mess.

Subsequent rounds (After turn has ended):

<Monstername> winces for X damage.

Or

You wince for X damage.

•Enthroned in the Crown of Thrones: <name> is unable to sit in the Crown of Thrones. In its anger, it spits poison at the monster.
Or
<name> is unable to sit in the Crown of Thrones. In its anger, it spits poison at you.

Enemy Attack decreased by Y
Enemy Defense decreased by Z
Or
Attack decreased by Y
Defense decreased by Z

•With the lucky Tam O'Shanter equipped:*
<name> stares at you for a moment, then hisses "Mowgli?" Boy, that was strange.

•With the miniature gravy-covered maypole equipped:
<name> clings awkwardly to the maypole, forming an strange half of a caduceus.

•With the wax lips equipped:
<name> looks at you and hisses. You resist the urge to laugh.

Arena Messages:
•When entered into a Scavenger Hunt:
<name> tries to find the items, but it's constant thrashing makes this task nearly impossible.

Notes:

The chance of the snake striking is a 50% chance.
The chance of poisoning an opponent is 80%.
The chance of poisoning the character is 20%.

The poison ability follows the following equation*:
Damage per round=Fam. weight + (Fam weight x Rounds passed^.4)
Percent Chance to poison: Fam. Weight x 2*

The spit mechanics are as follows:
Y+Z are randomly determined.
Y+Z=(Sqrt. Of Fam Weight+Sqrt. Of Fam Weight)^2, rounded down.
Each subsequent round, the victim loses *points in their ability to attack and defend. The total points given out to reduce their statistics are randomly distributed and calculated by Points=Fam. Weight/10.

*The poison ability does not stack; however, the damage given not restart when an enemy is poisoned again. The spit ability occurs only once in a combat.

Pill of Chlordiazepoxide

This is a pill of chlordia-whatever. You're not sure what it contains, but whatever this stuff is, it's pretty effective for sleep therapy.

Type: familiar equipment
Familiar: Thrashing Snake
Selling Price: 250 meat
(In-game plural: Pills of Chlordiazepoxide)

Enchantment:
+5 to familiar weight